Bedtime stories can’t buy G-Wagons
Some lunch meetings have more impact than others. Ron and Jacob’s once-a-quarter bread-breaking, something they’d held sacred since they met almost four years ago, was nothing if not high-impact. It always left both feeling pleased to have invested their valuable time in building the relationship.
It doesn’t need to be stated, and a better narrator would simply omit this detail, but neither Ron nor Jacob has so much as touched a loaf of bread in years. Sure, the title of the ritual outing was always “Breaking Bread” on the calendar invite, but that’s nothing more than a touch of wit and humor between professional acquaintances. (The wit stems from how closely the title resembles their shared favorite television show, while the humor arises from the fact that they both practice intermittent fasting.) They do order food to maintain appearances.
This particular lunch took place in the same spot as the others. I’ve chosen to omit the restaurant’s name since they declined to sponsor this story — a request they didn’t understand, and I couldn’t explain. I will admit that the establishment is known as the gathering place for prominent founders and investors. The food is overpriced, and the drinks are watered down, but, as I mentioned earlier (proving I may have been selling myself short as a narrator), these days, no one eats lunch or drinks anything other than the enhanced water they bring from home.
“Bro, I’m telling you, you have to come tonight,” Ron said to Jacob after they finished ordering entrees. “The fireside chat will be dogshit boring, something about how to raise venture capital, but the networking will be so baller — so money — that skipping whatever you said you had to do tonight is the only option.”
“I don’t know, man. My wife will kill me if I miss another one of my kid’s concerts.”
“Your wife? Doesn’t she know you’re only doing it for her future?”
“I mean, you’re right, of course, but that doesn’t track whenever I try to explain it to her that way.”
“Would a brand new G-Wagon track? Because that’s the kind of business that can come out of tonight. I’m telling you — everyone will be there.”
“I wish she understood I don’t like going to these things — at all. Just a bunch of egos in a room pretending to like each other so they can gain some sort of advantage.”
“Yeah, you’d never hang out with the kind of people who go to these events in real life, but you’ve got to be willing to suck it up if you want to win.”
“You’re right. I’m sure I’ll see you there.”
“Wait — did you say you have a kid? How old?”
Ron was right about the fireside — it was dogshit — but wrong about the networking. The people there weren’t the right people. He didn’t want to talk to those people; he wanted to connect with the people who weren’t there. Frankly, he would have preferred speaking to literally anyone other than the people who showed up. Where were the right people? He hoped they didn’t find out he was there. That wouldn’t be a good look — attending an event that wasn’t worth the right people’s time.
On the drive home, with the All-Podcast playing in the background, Jacob thought about how close he was to achieving his goal of becoming successful according to the standard of strangers. He deserved it. He’d put in the work, sacrificed what really mattered, and did a cold plunge every morning at exactly 5 am. Unfortunately, all this hustle was putting a major strain on his relationship with his wife and kids. They could tell he was distracted, struggling for presence even at home.
He was starting to wonder whether his wife still respected him. She seemed unimpressed by his accomplishments and had begun to resent his work. As a wife and mother, she wanted him to be nothing more than a husband and father. Had he taken the best days of her life in pursuit of the world's respect and admiration while losing it from the only people who truly matter?
He wasn’t sure if his kids understood what he did outside the house; they probably wouldn’t recognize out-of-the-house dad. They knew he was gone a lot. Why did other people need their dad more than they did? Jacob knew he couldn’t rise to his own defense if asked. As Childers sings, there was a good man in the making once, but is he still alive?
As he snuck into his daughter’s room to kiss her goodnight, she woke up and asked, “How did the event go, Dad?”
“It was fine, sweetie. How was your choir concert?”
“It was good. I missed a few notes, but Mom says no one noticed. She recorded it on her phone for you.”
“I can’t wait to watch it. Sorry I missed it, kiddo.”
“It’s okay, Dad. I know you’re busy. Love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Jacob turned off the night lamp and gently closed the door. He stood outside his daughter’s room longer than necessary. At the event, one of the speakers discussed the importance of balancing work and home life. Don’t hesitate to work hard, he advised, knowing it will pay off when you achieve success and can spend your time as you choose. As he listened, Jacob thought about all of the time he would spend with his wife and kids once he reached the finish line. That’s who he’d want to be with after finally achieving success.
Now, at home with everyone asleep, he wondered why he couldn't bypass the success part — whatever that meant — and just choose his wife and kids right now. What was he waiting for?
Jacob typed the question in his notes app so he could discuss it with Ron at their next lunch. Glancing at the time, he realized he needed to go to bed soon if he hoped to get tomorrow morning’s cold plunge in. He needed the clarity that icy water offered before another day of sacrificing himself to the grind.